Category — News
Man Kills Dog, Soils Corpse Over 2% Salary Increase, Weak Economy Blamed
The declining U.S. economy claimed one more victim today, this time a Boston terrier by the name of Mr. Harvey.
February 4, 2009 at 7:55 am 2 Comments
Dying Artist Pays Tribute to Woman Who Inspired Him to Paint, Distracted Him From Painting
Spanish artist Ferdinand Santiago has announced that he will donate his life’s earnings to the school of art at the Universidad De Castilla-La Mancha. [Read more →]
December 3, 2008 at 1:35 am 2 Comments
Ahmadinejad Says Allowing Iran to Nuke Millions Only Way to Solve Atomic Dispute
Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad says the key to solving the nuclear standoff between Iran and the West is for the UN to formally acknowledge Iran’s sovereign right to build bombs and kill people. Ahmadinejad made the statement just one day after formally acknowledging the latest round of UN sanctions by urinating on them and mailing them back to the UN, still wet, with a photo of his own ass covered in 191 red lipstick marks. [Read more →]
August 3, 2008 at 1:52 pm 2 Comments
Spitzer Sues Prostitute Over Sex Addiction
In a surprising turn of events, NY Governor Eliot Spitzer has filed a lawsuit against “Kristen”, a prostitute for the Emperor’s Club prostitution ring. Spitzer’s complaint alleges that “Kristen’s” refusal to allow him to sleep with her bareback, while allegedly knowing of his sexual addiction, constituted unfair exploitation of an ADA-protected disability. [Read more →]
March 11, 2008 at 7:01 am 5 Comments
New Smart Calculator “Gets It Wrong So You Don’t Have To”
The new Texas Instruments SmartCalc™ calculator comes preprogrammed to get answers wrong – in your favor – without a single, extra button press. [Read more →]
February 12, 2008 at 6:03 am 2 Comments
