Crack, pot, Thunderbird, amphetamines, LSD, cigarettes, magic markers, Elmer's Glue. These are just some of the things a busy wino has to keep track of from day to day.
Sure, one tries to keep the most essential items close by in the child-seat of one's shopping cart. But even so, there's more to being an aimless bum than hoarding material possessions. If this is the position you're finding yourself in, it's time to face facts. You're one disorganized, drug-addicted bastard.
That's why you need The Druginizer.
More than just a portable cabinet, The Druginizer automatically sorts your possessions according to your degree of addiction. The Druginizer uses both olfactory and video sensory devices to detect the nature of the enclosed items along with the level of your neurotic behavior associated with each item. When a fix is called for, just reach into The Druginizer's ingenious Unidrawer and the prescribed item will be right there waiting for you.
It's the perfect gift for any hopeless leech on society.
