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Page 1

Top 10 Must-See Movies for Liberals

Robo-Hood

by Jason Roth

An ex-hippie radical, now working for a major technology company, has discovered that the secret to leveling the social and economic playing field is to create a giant fucking robot. Armed with an AC (artificial compassion) processing unit and a laser-guided weapons system, Robo-Hood and his band of transvestite cyborgs annihilate the rich, plunder bank accounts, and appropriate businesses. After wasting rich executives with its laser arrows, Robo-Hood inserts a three-pronged, metal probe into the sides of their skulls and downloads their social security numbers, mothers' maiden names, and spouses' birth dates.

After all the world's wealth has been redistributed, Robo-Hood begins to question his purpose in life. While his AC system is running on auto-pity, he detects a child on line at a run-down hospital, waiting for a blood transfusion. Robo-Hood is shocked to discover that other people's money will not save the child. His AC system short-circuits and Robo-Hood attacks his creator, drains the hippie's blood, and injects it into the ailing child.

Unfortunately, even though the blood transfusion was unnecessarily prescribed as a result of a misdiagnosis by a socialist doctor, it's the wrong blood type and the child dies. To level the playing field, Robo-Hood kills everyone else.

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