As a kid, I used to pick up all the pennies I found. I could at least envision some potential value that that could be obtained with a handful of pennies - a piece of gum, for instance. Now, I sometimes walk past a nickel, though its silver color is usually enough to attract my attention. In general, however, I will pretty much always stop on a dime. Therefore, the necessary and sufficient coinage to alter my behavior is normally ten cents.
Now, here's what's annoying. You're on line at a store and a fellow customer drops a penny while fiddling for change. This is not something I would pick up for myself, yet I feel the need to pick it up out of politeness. I bet there are plenty of pieces of trash worth more than one cent and I don't pick those up, but here I am picking up this nearly valueless copper object for a complete stranger. You might say that the act is more an act of courtesy towards the store owner than the penniless customer, since the penny is basically litter. But if the customer dropped something that was clearly trash, say a gum wrapper, I would gladly leave it on the floor. Let the bastard pick up his own litter. I guess it comes down to pennies being money and I have this lingering feeling that money ought to be possessed by somebody.
I think the time has come to eliminate pennies from our monetary system. I'm tired of picking them up for strangers, and I'm tired of store clerks handing them to me. What do I want with a penny? It's more of a hassle than a benefit. I need to put it in my pocket, carry it around, take it out of my pocket, and put it in something for storage until I bring my change to the supermarket to exchange for cash. This is a complete waste of my time.
Think about how pennies are used. The only legitimate use that I can think of is for businesses to fuck with their customers. That is, to give their customers the illusion that their products cost less than their actual prices by a decimal place. Something $9.99 seems like it costs closer to $9.00 instead of $10.00, and something $99.99 seems like it costs $90.00 instead of $100.00.
What would we really lose if we eliminated pennies? As far as the price of products go, I think we'd actually save four cents per product. Businesses are obviously not going to drop the psychological warfare. They'll just lower prices to the next nickel. Instead of paying $9.99, you'll pay $9.95. Not only do you save four cents per product, but you have fewer coins to carry around.
Of course, there is sales tax to worry about. In New Jersey, it's 6%, and in New York City, it's 8.625%. That's going to cause a serious problem at the cash register. Simple solution: round the total price down to nearest nickel. Better solution: eliminate sales tax entirely, but I'll even take a lack of pennies before a lack of sales tax.
In fact, if the government will eliminate pennies for me, I'll send them all the pennies I have. They can collect everyone's pennies, melt them down, and make a big, copper dildo. Put it on display right next to the Lincoln Memorial. His head has been on the penny, so it's only fair. They can call it "The Lincoln Log".
As a kid, I always liked Lincoln Logs.
